I heard a rumor that Phillip Fulmer is only going to dress 18 players for the South Carolina game Saturday. He figures the rest should be able to dress themselves.
I have been a good boy this year. I haven't really been a good coach though. I hope you give me good presents this year. I would like you to somehow make me thin like Steve Spurrier. I tried the nutra-system diet but it makes me so hungry. Also, I don't know if this is possible or not but you are Santa. Can you go back in time and make me a hesiman trophy winner like Steve Spurrier. I think it would be so cool and people would like me better. Finaly, can you please, please kill Steve Spurrier. He makes my life miserable. I can never measure up to him and he is just so damn cocky.
I love you,
P.S. I am sorry I ate all the cookies last year before you came. I promise you will have some this year.
Wow! I can't believe Fulmer hates Spurrier so much. He may need to be put on suicide watch after Saturdays game.